jwangyh's Xanga

Saturday, March 07, 2009

Sat, 07 Mar 2009 07:39:01 GMT

the female praying mantis bites the males head off while copulating, the koala bear is basically a junkie constantly high on eucalyptus leaves, many species of animals feed on their young when nothing else is available. Chimpanzees and a lot of their fellow apes are chronic masturbators and copulate constantly,both in the wild and in captivity. Incest is very common. They also use rape to punish the females into submission. Furthermore, they have learned a clever way of fermenting fruits in puddles of water thus making an alcoholic slush which they force-feed the females with and rape them when they pass out. Dolphins have the habit of swimming close to the surface, facing each others bellies, and using their fins, they jerk eachother off.
Seems like the smarter you get the weirder you get.

Why Chinese shouldn't have Christian names

Mon, 08 Sep 2008 13:01:53 GMT

Anne Chang
(Mandarin)-Dirty

Anne Chin
(Mandarin) - Keep quiet

Faye Chen
(Mandarin) - Dusty

Carl Cheng
(Hokkien) - Buttock

Monica Cheng
Hokkien) - Touching your buttocks

Lucy Leow
(Hokkien) - You are dead

Jane Tan
(Mandarin) - Frying eggs

Suzie Leow
(Hokkien) - Lost till death

Henry Mah
(Mandarin) - Hate your mum

Corrine Tai
(Hokkien) - Poor fellow

Paul Chan
(Mandarin) - Bankrupt

Nelson Tan
(Mandarin) - Bird laying eggs

Leslie Tong
(Mandarin) - Rubbish bin

Carmen Teng
(Hokkien) - Leg hair long

Connie Mah
(Cantonese) - Call your
mother

Danny See
(Hokkien) - Squeeze you to death

Rosie Teng
(Hokkien) - Screws and nails

Pete Tsai
(Hokkien) - Nose droppings

Macy Koh
(Cantonese) - Never die before

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 12:22:05 GMT

God: I can give you a woman who makes food and has sex with you whenever you want. She won't complain and will be quiet.

Adam: hmm....what can i get with one rib?

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

Tue, 02 Jan 2007 13:45:23 GMT

looking for that perfect gift guys? take a tip from justin timberlake cos he really knows how to please women.

Wednesday, December 27, 2006

Wed, 27 Dec 2006 08:48:33 GMT

i just realised that my previous 2 entries were spaced one month apart and posted on the 22nd of each month....i feel sad now that i didnt post on 22nd dec...would be a nice pattern to post once a month or something. but nothing i can do abt it, i was in switzi on 22nd anyway.....and the internet access there is darn expensive...5 francs for 15 mins or something like that...urghhh...now i think abt it everything there is just expensive la...in the end just buy bread and cheese from the supermarket to eat....but it was a fruitful trip in terms of seeing the country...yup all the postcard pictures are true...it kinda does look like that...snowy peaks and valleys with rustic railways.....nice kinda place....generally clean and efficient...ppl quite nice though theres the noisy kids everywhere on their skate scooters....hmmm....its time to get down to work...3 reports and 2 projects to work on...urgh...how am i gonna find time for guildwars like this....

Wednesday, November 22, 2006

Wed, 22 Nov 2006 16:53:53 GMT

yah i havent updated in some time. I would like to but i'm very busy playing computer games. Guildwars is very time consuming and requires extreme dedication to perfect. Guess that explains why i'm not on msn either. So if you have something to tell me you can log on to guildwars and look for me there. cheerios

Sunday, October 22, 2006

Sun, 22 Oct 2006 22:25:08 GMT

i've been having fun playing with MATLAB(matrix laboratory) while working on my project. there's something abt programming thats very reassuring...almost therapeutic...its all so logical and you get a fixed output for every input....i like programming i think...somehow it makes me feel smart and geeky...

Saturday, October 07, 2006

Sat, 07 Oct 2006 06:42:35 GMT

i have been quite occupied the last week or so. when i'm not reading up for my project, i watch one piece, 24, lost, greys anatomy, desperate houswives or simply play guildwars. its a very involved existence which takes up a lot of time. Otherwise there's always some menial chore around the house to do....like cooking...hah. last night's dinner was pretty good though....made a beef stew....ok so its kinda cheating cos i used 'beef tonight'....oh well...it was on offer mah...33p for the bottle only.

and my bicycle has finally arrived...after its long and arduous journey from hamburg...took it aound a week or so...and when it came i still had to assemble it...or try...but frankly its much too hard...especially since i didnt even have the right tools....so whatever i came up with most likely would be too dangerous to even attempt cycling on the roads...anyway i decided to let the experts do the job instead....cost me an extra 35 quid though...urghh...oh yeah i changed my saddle too...cos the original one is too hard and makes my butt ache. I got one of those nice ergonomic ones with the central groove so i can relieve pressure to sensitive arteries and nerves....a little investment is always useful to stave off impotence....

Saturday, September 23, 2006

Sat, 23 Sep 2006 05:38:50 GMT

i'm back in london again. was a pretty good flight but once in london moving the luggage to our new place was quite a pain. went to see meiqi's new place and its actually a pretty nice and new apartment...underneath all that dirt and grime....hah....seems like it wasnt really cleaned up much after they did renovations or something. oh well at least she can go through the fun/hassle of furniture shopping. my place on the other hand is rather done up already...its pretty small but all the essential stuff is already set up cos there's been like generations of sporeans living there. so i can just turn on my laptop and connect to the internet...hah.

weather has been pretty ok last couple days....first day i came it was like 26 degrees....definitely still summer...but its cooled down a bit last 2 days to a more comfortable 20 i think....

i tried to buy those tv tuners that can plug into your laptop but i cant really get it to work cos i dont have an outdoor aerial....so reception is bad...sigh..guess that means i have no tv this year...so sad.....no matter how many videos i d/l it cant fully make up for the lack of tv...what's gonna happen to my weekly dose of soccer...darn..i've been spoilt by having cable tv back in spore....channel surfing from channel 22 to 24 will soon be no more than a hazy memory...

Wednesday, September 20, 2006

Wed, 20 Sep 2006 12:30:47 GMT

today is my last day in spore. i ate lobster and crab. yum...lobsters are definitely not big prawns...they taste a lot better. yum...it must be fun to run a lobster farm